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Offline Tizzy  
#1 Posted : Tuesday, April 3, 2018 1:34:04 AM(UTC)
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T-A-G left the room to cook is "frozen pizza"--ick

He forgot to lock his screen, so of course, I had to look around, check his progress.

So Tantor wanted a preliminary blurb for COA and OOA and T-A-G had to send them something.

So I thought I would share it with you. I am thinking it's a good way to keep pressure on him.

I will post each in their own forum.

________________________________________________________________________________________________
Chronicles of Astlan: Into the Wilds
His Holy Highness, Kristof Torson, Imperial Prince of Etonia, youngest son of His Holy Imperial Majesty Rafaestus Torson III, the Holy Etonian Emperor and Imperial Prince of Pontificates led a rather calm, carefree and comfortably pleasant life, secure in the knowledge that as the Seventh in Line to the Holy Etonian Throne, the weight of worry that came with the crown was safely at bay. Unfortunately, as he was soon to discover, his life was about to get a bit more—interesting.

For while Prince Kristof may be a safe seventh in line to the Etonian throne, with both uncles, aunts and cousins ahead of him in line--his father having only lost two of 11 potential heirs—the situation was a bit more pressing on his mother’s side. His mother, his father’s fourth wife, was the daughter of Hugart, Lord Narthan, the defacto ruler of the Wilds of Eton. Lord Narthan had been decidedly less fortunate in terms of heirs, and unlike the Empire, House Narthan’s line of succession was purely patrimonial.

Lord Hugart had previously lost three heirs to unusually unfortunate deaths, and while visiting the installation of his younger sister and her new husband, Hugo, the Duke of Sur Etonia, Kristof learns that his uncle, Chief Filip, the current heir of House Narthan, had just perished in a—not surprisingly for House Narthan—rather grisly manner. This left Prince Kristof third in line to the Nathan throne, behind his cousin and infant nephew; and, unfortunately, due its patrimonial nature, currently the last possible successor.
Given the rampant mortality on his mother’s side, the likelihood of Kristof becoming Chieftain or even Lord Narthan was now something that had to be planned for. Thus, his grandfather had decided it best for Kristof to come visit the Wilds and learn, “the family business.”
Unfortunately, “the family business” was not a humorous metaphor, Lord Narthan was quite literally a merchant king. The Wilds of Eton were a vast, untamed region of treacherous swampland filled with all sorts of disagreeable creatures and disreputable individuals. It was the only place on the entire continent of Eton, that the Empire had at no point, before or after the Vargosite Interregnum, seriously attempted to conquer. No emperor had ever found it worth the cost to subdue and then attempt to maintain order.

What made Lord Narthan the defacto Lord of the Wilds was his trading network of walled cities and villages linked by patrolled and dredged trails through the swamps. This network allowed the Narthans to harvest the riches of the swamp for trade across the rest of Astlan via their, heavily armed, merchant navy.

His father and mother had both agreed to Lord Narthan’s, arguably reasonable, request, and thus much to his dismay, Kristof would have to—literally—get his feet wet in the deadly swamps and marshlands that his older siblings liked to refer to as the Wilds of Eaten.

Edited by user Tuesday, April 17, 2018 1:54:58 PM(UTC)  | Reason: Not specified

Offline Dirk Flamberge  
#2 Posted : Wednesday, April 4, 2018 1:54:56 AM(UTC)
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Damn you! now i want to read it even more AND I CANT X.X
Offline Tizzy  
#3 Posted : Wednesday, April 4, 2018 2:08:49 AM(UTC)
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Torture is what we demons do!
Offline EyeDeKay  
#4 Posted : Tuesday, April 17, 2018 5:11:55 AM(UTC)
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Dang, that's really good!
Offline Tizzy  
#5 Posted : Tuesday, April 17, 2018 1:58:29 PM(UTC)
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I'll let T-A-G know, I'm sure he'll appreciate it.

It may make him feel better about me ransacking his computer to get the blurbs. He's been in a snit ever since.

Offline Mikey  
#6 Posted : Wednesday, April 25, 2018 10:31:37 PM(UTC)
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Offline Tizzy  
#7 Posted : Thursday, April 26, 2018 12:36:21 AM(UTC)
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Ahem! Excuse me!

That is not how how that song goes!

They changed the ending!

I know the devil in that story, George, and he won fair and square and he's got Johnny scrubbing his toilets to this day!

Tsk, Tsk, Tsk!

Offline Tizzy  
#8 Posted : Thursday, April 26, 2018 12:37:23 AM(UTC)
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PS: That really looks like George though. Not sure where they found an actor that could pull it off, but he sure did.
Offline Dungeon Roomba  
#9 Posted : Friday, April 27, 2018 9:49:24 PM(UTC)
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Heaven's Propaganda Team is pretty good. Not as good as the Elves', but still pretty good.
Gelatinous Cube
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"Because there's always a 10x10-foot room for Jell-O"
Offline Tizzy  
#10 Posted : Friday, April 27, 2018 10:34:45 PM(UTC)
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Sigh. So true, too true!
Offline Mikey  
#11 Posted : Friday, April 27, 2018 11:34:16 PM(UTC)
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Originally Posted by: Gelcube Go to Quoted Post
Heaven's Propaganda Team is pretty good.

There's a reason why people call it Heaven rather than Ignorant Tightassville.
Offline Tizzy  
#12 Posted : Saturday, April 28, 2018 12:33:58 PM(UTC)
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Excellent point!

You know, I know we have (more than a few) openings in the PR department here at the Forces of Evil HQ. Are you open to new positions? (rack, iron maiden, Catherine Wheel, Judas Cradle--we have the latest in ergonomic office furniture) Sure, it means a small relocation, but wouldn't it be nice to get out of that chilly climate of yours to something a tad warmer? Like maybe 85C warmer?

Offline Dungeon Roomba  
#13 Posted : Saturday, April 28, 2018 4:00:39 PM(UTC)
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You know, Tom's been doing much better than any PR team lately. If he keeps it up, he may have every FoE faction behind him, and maybe even some of the FoG.

You could call it the Forces of Tom, or maybe Forces Apart Ran by Tom.
Gelatinous Cube
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Offline Rakshasa  
#14 Posted : Saturday, April 28, 2018 4:50:57 PM(UTC)
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Originally Posted by: Tizzy Go to Quoted Post
Excellent point!

You know, I know we have (more than a few) openings in the PR department here at the Forces of Evil HQ. Are you open to new positions? (rack, iron maiden, Catherine Wheel, Judas Cradle--we have the latest in ergonomic office furniture) Sure, it means a small relocation, but wouldn't it be nice to get out of that chilly climate of yours to something a tad warmer? Like maybe 85C warmer?



Not to be mean Tizzy, but I'm pretty sure that it's statements like yours (this one specifically, mind you) that really hurts the FoE PR department. I mean we all realize that you aren't intending to sound evil or cruel... but it's pretty easy to twist them into statements that people (I.E non-ascended/descended humans and other mortals) take as threatening or hostile.

Most mortals have this weird desire to avoid sensations that cause pain after all.
Offline Tizzy  
#15 Posted : Saturday, April 28, 2018 10:04:26 PM(UTC)
Tizzy

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Originally Posted by: Gelcube Go to Quoted Post
You know, Tom's been doing much better than any PR team lately. If he keeps it up, he may have every FoE faction behind him, and maybe even some of the FoG.

You could call it the Forces of Tom, or maybe Forces Apart Ran by Tom.


Or maybe the Forces Of Orcus: FOO!

FOO on You! if you attack us!
Offline Tizzy  
#16 Posted : Saturday, April 28, 2018 10:11:09 PM(UTC)
Tizzy

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Originally Posted by: Rakshasa Go to Quoted Post


Not to be mean Tizzy, but I'm pretty sure that it's statements like yours (this one specifically, mind you) that really hurts the FoE PR department. I mean we all realize that you aren't intending to sound evil or cruel... but it's pretty easy to twist them into statements that people (I.E non-ascended/descended humans and other mortals) take as threatening or hostile.



What? I thought ergonomic office furniture was a big plus? You know like these employers who give their peeps "standing desks" and expect them to stand all day long? Or how about those rolly ball things that they make people sit on?

Originally Posted by: Rakshasa Go to Quoted Post

Most mortals have this weird desire to avoid sensations that cause pain after all.


But with no pain, there is no gain, yes? I just want people to be gainfully employed!



Offline Rakshasa  
#17 Posted : Saturday, April 28, 2018 11:35:46 PM(UTC)
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Originally Posted by: Tizzy Go to Quoted Post
Originally Posted by: Rakshasa Go to Quoted Post


Not to be mean Tizzy, but I'm pretty sure that it's statements like yours (this one specifically, mind you) that really hurts the FoE PR department. I mean we all realize that you aren't intending to sound evil or cruel... but it's pretty easy to twist them into statements that people (I.E non-ascended/descended humans and other mortals) take as threatening or hostile.



What? I thought ergonomic office furniture was a big plus? You know like these employers who give their peeps "standing desks" and expect them to stand all day long? Or how about those rolly ball things that they make people sit on?

Originally Posted by: Rakshasa Go to Quoted Post

Most mortals have this weird desire to avoid sensations that cause pain after all.


But with no pain, there is no gain, yes? I just want people to be gainfully employed!





See there's ergonomic and then the usage of words like Iron Maiden which confuse mortals. And while I agree that pain is helpful (mistakes too) as a learning tool... most mortals still try to avoid painful things. Hence why you often unintentionally create PR opportunities for the FoG... you aren't saying things that are actually "evil" or cruel, but they are easily seen as such with only a little twisting because your perspective is so alien to most mortals.
Offline Tizzy  
#18 Posted : Sunday, April 29, 2018 2:54:29 PM(UTC)
Tizzy

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Hmm

Have you ever used any of that other ergonomic furniture? I am really not sure I can tell the difference between that stuff and the more traditionalist stuff we use here.

But perhaps you are right, but we can probably help with their thinking. My buddy, Pinhead, has these little puzzles to teach mortals the subtleties of pain and pleasure. Maybe if I get a couple hundred thousands of his puzzles and started giving them out, people could use them, learn and grow?

Might be a great marketing tool!

Yea! I like this idea, some mighty find swag! Dancing


Offline Mikey  
#19 Posted : Wednesday, May 2, 2018 3:52:51 PM(UTC)
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Offline Tizzy  
#20 Posted : Wednesday, May 2, 2018 7:12:32 PM(UTC)
Tizzy

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I have to admit, I am very impressed by their ability to group teleport while singing and dancing.

That requires a lot of skill, even if the teleportation is being done by someone behind the camera, many people experience disorientation immediately after teleporting, but the fellows just keep on groovin.

Betting they are archdemons with that much skill.

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